CHAPTER THE SEVENTH

Distraught and in pain

In Mga hinagpis nang aking pusong nalulumbay on Agosto 13, 2016 at 8:37 umaga

THE BODY - Mariah Carey

I woke up early. Hindi ako mapakali! The presence of that who ruined me is causing me restlessness again! I tried very hard to ignore the distraught! I focused instead on the effort of quelling back the pain! I somehow managed to do so. And so I thought.

Because of the unwanted emotion, feeling ko nanaman ay ang dami kong mga trabaho na kailangang tapusin. Nagbalak akong mag simulang magtrabaho nang maaga. Pakiramdam ko hindi pa enough yung mga ginagawa ko lately! Dapat marami pa akong ma-accomplish! Dapat marami pa akong magawa! Hindi pa sapat ang lahat!

Urong sulong ako. One minute I am so decided to work. Then another second aatras. Nagdedebate yung isip ko. A voice in my head, one who is sounding very demanding and sure, says: “You need to work! Dapat magpaka busy ka! Dapat kumita ka nang malaking kuwalta! Isubsob mo ang sarili mo sa pagkayod! Salapi ang sukatan nang pagkatao!” But another voice, one that is more calming, whispers: “Take it easy. Don’t rush. Okay lang ang lahat. Huwag mong masyadong i-stress ang sarili mo. Take a deep breath.”

I decided to listen to the second voice in my head. I’ll be okay. Apektado lang ako nang panahon. Aalis din mamaya maya yung siyang dumungis at yumurak sa aking pagkatao! Bibili na lang muna ako nang Pandesal sa Bakery sa Camerino Street. Papalamanan ko nang maraming Butter. Then i’ll drink tea. Pampakalma.

Maaga pa. Maulan parin sa labas. Magiging okay rin ang lahat. Makikinig muna ako kay Mariah Carey.

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